Dear Joyce
I have a friend I’ve known for over 20 years who recently downsized (we’re in our 60s) and asked if he could store some things at my house, since he has no room at the apartment he just moved into. And it’s not small stuff: an antique car, a motorcycle, a snowblower. None of it is in great shape, either. It’s taking up a lot of room and it’s already been three years. I asked him many times to find somewhere else, maybe even to rent a storage locker. But he keeps giving me all kinds of excuses for why he can’t move it. I don’t want to ruin the friendship, but this is really starting to make me angry. How should I handle it?
-Frustrated Friend
***
Dear Frustrated Friend
Are you serious? For three years? It’s amazing to me that you see him as a friend when what this guy is doing is not out of friendship but out of a need to have a place to store his junk. He’s taking advantage of your generosity. I have another name for him, and it is not friend.
I get that you’ve asked him to get his stuff numerous times and that he hasn’t done it. Why would he? He knows whatever deadline you’ve set means nothing.
The problem here is you’ve given this guy control over this situation and he knows it. I believe the expression is “with friends like this who needs enemies?”
Come on, girl. Pull up your big-girl pants and let this guy know once and for all the deal is off. Set a date for him to get his crap taken away or you will have it removed. Period!
The last thing, and this is most important…be sure you mean it or don’t bother to say it. You and he have been down this road before so be sure to have everything set up to follow through and then boom, make it happen. He’s had enough warnings and now has no one to blame but himself.
You can do this,
Joyce
“Joyce” is a local social worker (Masters of Social Work) and counselor with decades of experience helping people sort through personal problems. Her responses are *advice only* and neither she nor The Reporter takes responsibility for any outcomes of the situations described in the letters received.
Anyone with a question/problem for Joyce should send an email to news@brandonreporter.com with “Dear Joyce” in the subject line. We do not guarantee that all submissions will be used. Anonymous submissions are fine, though we will reject anything obscene, violent, or disrespectful toward any community. We will also edit for length, clarity, punctuation, and spelling.
